Middle School Chicken Humor

Current Count: 141 eggs

One of my friends who's a middle school administrator sent this to me via the inner-district mail:



Apparently, one of the seventh grade boys drew this in art. As the class was getting ready to leave he walked up to a girl and said, "Hey, you wanna see my cock?" Then he flashed this picture....he, he, he.

Don't get me wrong. An administrator in that situation has to take some kind of disciplinary action. It was totally inappropriate and he needs to receive a consequence, but really now, that's funny. Having to issue a consequence for that kind of double entendre humor (and it happens all the time) is always a source of inner conflict for me. I do it, but secretly I want say to kids, "Don't lose that irreverence. The ability to amuse yourself with your own wit can make for a very satisfying life." I can't imagine the Hell that would break loose on my campus if I ever actually did that. Yikes!

Stories like that are one of the reasons I loved working at the middle school level. The kids are so unpredictable they constantly do things that are both shocking and hilarious, piercing their own tongue in the girls' bathroom or playing tag with dry ice in their science class. More than once I've had to send students out of my office because their decision making has completely caught me off guard and I'm on the verge of laughing out loud.

They are also prone to making decisions that can severely limit their future options. It's one of the great stressors of the job. A kid's bad decison, a set of angry/upset/devastated parents, law enforcement and a school context is a really hard combination. In fact, I think I would say that being a middle school vice principal is the hardest job I've done yet in education. It came with a lot of joy and professional satisfaction, but it sure did raise my blood pressure.

Chicken emergency #2

Current count: 130 eggs

Things continue to go well with the little chickens and the big chickens, and yesterday was the first day they let themselves out of the garden area. It was cute, but it did result in another chicken emergency phone call from T.

I was at dinner in Woodland with some folks I used to work with when my phone rang. It was home. I stepped outside and answered to hear T. breathing heavily on the other end. "When are you coming home?" he asked.

I said, "I don't know. What's up?"

"Do you think it will be before dark?" Now, I have to say that my first response was to ask whether he was worried about vampires, but I didn't because I could imagine he wouldn't find that nearly as amusing as I did. That turned out to be a good choice.

"Probably. Why?"

"Because all four of the chickens are out and they're running all over the yard and they won't go back inside." If you think about it, that's a pretty funny picture...four chickens of varying sizes taking evasive maneuvers in the backyard while a full grown adult chases them back and forth. The only thing missing is carnival music

"All four are out? Oh, that's great! The little ones are finally getting big enough to hang out with the big ones." As it turned out, that wasn't really the right thing to say either.

"Yeah, well, it's not so cute right now. I'm leaving them out and if they get eaten because it gets dark..." The implication was clear. My failure to return home before dark would certainly doom the chickens to a frightening and painful death and I would have no one to blame but myself. The sunshine (and fresh eggs) would depart from our lives, and it would all be because I was eating sushi and yukking it up with my friends in Woodland.

Ordinarily, I might have taken the bait and pointed out that human beings have been raising chickens for thousands of years so perhaps the wrong technique had been used. In fact, wouldn't it be worse if the chickens were savaged by a wild beast while someone was home who had just given up on making them safe, thereby assuming complete responsibility for loss of life and limb. The thing is, I still had sushi to eat, so I had to take full responsibility for the impending disaster.

"OK," I said, "I'll make sure I get home early enough to get them in before the chicken vampires come out." I just couldn't let the vampire thing go, plus I had to get in a little something. Overall, a very satisfying finish to the conversation. And anyway, it was still early and it's almost May in NorCal. It wasn't going to get dark until 7:50.

"OK. See you when you get home."

There are a couple different ways this story has a happy ending. First, there was still sushi left, and I got to eat it. Second, when I got home, T. had already managed to get #2 and #3 in. Only the little ones were out, and they were pretty easy to get put away. Finally, and perhaps best for all concerned, nobody was eaten or pulled limb from limb by night creatures.


In other news, I've been meaning to link to a couple things for a while so here they are. I spend a lot of time on a highly addictive trivia quiz site called Sporcle.com. These particular quizzes are in keeping with the blog theme, so I thought I'd give folks a shot at them. The first one is a sort of chicken geography quiz. This one is even more egg-citing!

Meet and Greet

Current count: 115 eggs

We went to Long Beach for the weekend, and the chickens both big and small, were fine. They've now had several opportunities to be together in the yard, and the big ones hardly even seem to notice the little ones. They're certainly not attacking them, which is what I was worried would happen. In this picture, the little ones are in the upper left corner. Neither of them is facing the camera, but I don't think it's because they're shy.


I walked out the back door and caught #2 in the dog crate earlier today. Again, she wasn't even paying attention to them, but it did look like #4 and #5 were both a little overwhelmed by the whole things. #2 got out when I told her to, but she did look like she's now developed a taste for the chick start. As far as I can tell, she won't suffer any ill effects from eating it, but I do want to make sure the little ones get everything they need.

Just As I Feared

Current Count: 101 eggs

It's a little unbelievable to me that we've already passed the 100 egg mark since the first post back in December. They just keep laying away. If we did have a rooster, we could make our flock huge in no time at all. Keep in mind, I'm not all interested in doing that...unless society actually collapses.

In other news, we went to Dallas for a week to visit T.'s brother. It was a fun trip, got to meet a friend of his who was also out visiting (but from South Carolina). I can't wait to get the pictures. While we were there, I read No Country for Old Men by Cormac McCarthy...brutal and dark, but I did find it to be beautifully written.

Anyway, when we returned, I was walking around the house and discovered:

AAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGH!

I knew this would happen eventually...the straw would wind up getting everywhere it possibly could and completely take over our lives. We're totally happy to be part of the ecosystem, providing birds and animals places to eat, drink, and raise their young. I'm sure the birds in this particular case thought they had hit the jackpot when they discovered the straw, but I have to draw the line somewhere and this is it. Besides being a little too Beverly Hillbillies, it feels like a fire hazard. It's coming down.

In addition, it appears the rainy season is pretty much over for a while (not good news for our reservoirs in NorCal) so we went ahead and raked all the hay out of the coop, revealing the earth again. It appears to have weathered the winter just fine, so we're giving it a chance to to dry out.

We've also moved the little chickens out to the garden area where the big chickens started about a year ago. They're hanging out in their crate and having supervised time outside. It's a pretty good gig for them. They appear to like it better than being in the garage all the time.

Welcome home, little ones

Current count: 88 eggs

The two newest additions came home today. Towards the end of the day a couple of second grade teachers brought them to me all boxed up and ready to go. The chicks did a home visit with me, accompanied me on a visit to a friend's new baby, and went to the gym. Needless to say, it was a full day for them.

We resurrected the dog crate that #1, #2, and #3 grew up in. It's a little weatherbeaten but certainly functional. The cedar chips are long gone, but I gave them some of the ever-present straw and set them up in the garage. I'm fairly certain that I've now given the straw an entry into the house....grrrr. It won't be long before I'm finding it in bed.

They're still split between fuzzy and feathered. Take a look:


This was taken shortly after we transferred them from the box to the crate. I was a little worried about them when I first got them home because of the extended ride home, but they seem to have bounced back from the trip. Last time I checked they were making the little happy chicken noises to each other.

From Chickens to Sheep

Current count: 85 eggs

It looks like the new chicks are ready to come home, so we'll probably bring them home this week. I still have to set up the dog crate because they can't go out with the big girls until they have feathers. Even then, we'll have to figure out how to introduce them so that #2 and #3 aren't beating them up all the time.

While I was web surfing today, I discovered this. It's sheep and herding dogs, not chickens, but it's still worth watching. I hope you enjoy it.

The New Arrivals

Current count: 80 eggs

I don't usually post unless I get another egg, but one of the second grade teachers just sent me these pictures of our new chickens, so I had to share. Check them out:

All Hail the Lawnmower Man!

Current count: 80 eggs

Amazingly enough, the tweaky lawnmower man was successful on all counts...both the lawn mower and the blower are working again. T. mowed and blew both the front and the back right away, which made a huge difference with the Sanford and Son/Green Acres theme we had going on.

To me, it seems idyllic to see chickens scratching in the yard for bugs and eating greens. It doesn't seem idyllic to see them just outside your back door kicking around a pile of straw the dog has made sure to spread out all over your patio in some weird dog game. I love the chickens and everything, but....

In other chicken-and-school-related news, the eggs have begun hatching in second grade! This year I've gotten to see them at every phase of hatching, from the little hole in the top of the egg to the wet, tired, newly arrived chick to the fuzzball stage where they continually try and push themselves under every other chick around them to hide and be warm. I love it that our kids are getting to see this, and I feel a little bit of awe at the cycle of life every time I stop by to watch.

Spring Cleaning

Current Count: 78 eggs

I took some time to go after the straw today. I attacked the pile on the patio and mucked out the chicken coop, changing it over to fresh straw rather than leaving the ground uncovered. I also took out the cedar chips that have been in the roosting box and put in straw. Even with all that, we must still have 7/8 of that bale...yeesh. It's going to be June before I'm rid of the whole thing.

We also had the mobile lawn mower guy come over and fix the mower and the blower. That's going to make a huge difference if the guy manages to fix them. He's outside working on them in the driveway now...it's a business model I hadn't seen before in small machinery repair and frankly, it feels a little tweaky. All that being said, it's happening right now so I'm committed to hoping for the best and bringing him a bottle of water if he needs it. He may not, however, borrow a car antenna and some brillo pad.

In other news, I got in 41 miles on bike this weekend. I saw three fat turkeys and a ton of Canada geese along the American river. It was beautiful weather, and everything is bright green and budding because of the rain/sun combination.

Not Exactly How I Envisioned It

Current Count: 75 eggs

So this video is sort of how I feel about the backyard right now. The rain always makes things sort of yucky out there, but we've done a key thing that really added to the ambiance, effectively creating a cross between Sanford and Son and Green Acres.

The whole chain of events started when I finally got tired of the soupy coop situation and bought a bale of straw to put on the ground in the coop. It turned out to be the perfect solution because the chickens' feet are dry and now it smells like hay, a vast improvement over what we had going on before. The straw was also pretty much a bargain, $8.95 (3.5 dozen eggs) for a bale. It seems like it will last for a while.

In fact, it seems like it will probably be everywhere for a very long time.

T. brought the bale in under the patio on a red wagon we have because it was raining again. We decided to grab some off the end to take put it in the coop. As soon as T. cut the cord, the bale of straw POPPED out at both ends, covering the ground around the wagon with straw. The process of taking straw from the bale out to the chicken coop left another trail, and before I knew it, half our yard looked like a manger.

I did manage to wrestle the bale into a tarp and put it up against the coop. Now it looks like we have a body back there, but at least it's going to stop shredding straw all over the place.

Another Mysterious Egg-Sucking Incident

Current count: 66 eggs

I walked in from the garage this afternoon when I got home and stepped out into the sun room to see if the chickens were in the coop roosting or still out back. As soon as I slid open the door to the sun room the dog leaped off the futon and raced for the door, where he stood with his tail between his legs. The two cats jumped off the file cabinet and ran under the bed. Neither of these is usually a good sign. I was trying to figure out what they had done wrong when my eyes fell on what were clearly two different eggs that had been crunched up and licked clean...on the floor of the only room left where we have carpet. Grrrrr...

The problem, of course, is that I have no idea which of them are responsible. On top of that, neither T. nor I can figure out where the eggs came from. There was a green one and a brown one, so that's what we usually get, but all the eggs this week are accounted for on the calendar, and those numbers match what we have in the carton in the fridge. The whole thing is one big conundrum.

Soupy Coop

Current count: 63 eggs

So after an extended period of rain here in NorCal, it appears our french drain in the backyard is not really working at peak capacity....or maybe not at all. At any rate, our yard has converted into a marshland and the water is keeping the area in the chicken coop completely wet. This is a development I am not pleased with. At a bare minimum, it creates an olfactory problem. On the plus side (and I'm stretching here), I don't have to worry about them kicking over the food dishes. Why? Because they are now cemented down to the earth with a combination of mud and chicken poo. It seems inevitable that I am going to need a hazmat suit and a chisel to rectify the situation.

The chickens, meanwhile, spend a lot of time hanging out up in their henhouse, watching the damp floor to see if it's going to do anything scary. Usually it doesn't, so they lay eggs and hang out some more.

Blustery Day

Current Count: 58 eggs

We've got rain, high winds, and cloudy skies in Northern California today. It's a great day to stay inside with a fire if you got a fireplace. If you don't have a fireplace, then a fire is a lot riskier proposition...not really recommended.

The chickens thought they wanted to come out today, squawking and throwing a big old fit until we opened the door. Then they came out, took a quick spin around the yard and headed back into the coop because they didn't appear to like the wind or the rain. I have to say I feel the same way.

We picked up a new 50 lb. bag of feed and a new feeder with a bigger reservoir. The whole transaction was about $20.00, which is close to ten dozen eggs. The chickens started laying halfway through this bag of feed, so I don't really know how long they go on one bag. At the rate they are laying now, this bag would have to last until halfway through April and that would also cover the new feeder. I wonder if it will work out that way.

Kids and Chickens

Current Count: 55 eggs

So this one is about chickens, but it's also about kids. Several of our students know that I took home chickens from the batch hatched by second grade last year. One of our first grade teachers also mentioned this, and apparently it sparked some deep thought about chickens on the part of one 6-year old boy. Check it out:For those in need of translation, this say, "Sometimes chickens be alive." Notice the four legs and the smiling beak. The image in the upper left hand corner is a little bit of foreshadowing because this is what he wrote on the next page of his journal.

The translation for this one is, "Sometimes chickens be dead and i like chickens!" Notice how all four of the chicken legs have now converted to drumsticks and there is a smiling stick person on the right with what appear to be a drumstick in the right hand and a chicken nugget in the left. Mmm, mmm, good!

BoomBoom Beer

Current Count: 55 eggs

OK...so this entry isn't really about the chickens today, but as I mentioned before, I work at an elementary school. We are currently sponsoring a T-Shirt design contest for our western-themed carnival. This design came in from a third grader. Although it's completely inappropriate for general consumption, it is a funny one, and pretty revealing about the kid's perception of the wild west. Make sure to take note of the ultra-phallic guns on either shoulder. Yikes!

I'm a big lover of aliases and nicknames, so from here on out, I will be referring to this year's carnival as the "BoomBoom Beer" event. May a good time be had by all!

A Couple Egg-ccidents

Current count: 48 eggs

So we had a couple egg-ccidents worth reporting this week, if only because they were sort of funny.

#1 - T. was coming in with a newly laid egg and gave the sun room door a good solid yank to make sure it was closed tightly. In the process of doing this, he crunched the egg a little bit in his other hand and it started leaking so he threw it in the sink. He went to wash his hands in the bathroom and comes back to discover that one of the hairless cats has grabbed the leaking egg and dragged it all over the kitchen. After a Starsky and Hutch chase through the house, he recovered the egg (now mostly dry shell) and threw it away. Now, I have roots in The South, and I've heard of egg-sucking dogs, but never egg-sucking cats. In that vein, check this out: Dirty Old Egg Sucking Dog

#2 - I have a new dietary habit now, thanks to the chickens. Every morning, I have two cups of coffee, then rinse the cup, put two eggs in it, scramble them with a fork, and pop them in the microwave for a couple minutes to cook. Some day in the middle of the week I neglected to scramble the eggs with a fork and I heard them start popping in the microwave. That popping sound always mean there's going to be egg all over the inside of the microwave when I open door. This time, however, I opened the door in time because the egg was still confined to the cup. Not only that, the eggs also looked cooked and ready to eat. I stuck my fork into them and POP! Egg exploded out all over my face, in my hair, on the ceiling fan, and on the ceiling. It was in my eyebrows and all over my shirt and tie. I really should have taken a picture, but I didn't really have the presence of mind at the time. Talk about egg on your face.

Crazy week

Current count: 37 eggs

I started this week out complaining about how slow the week was going, and now I really can't believe tomorrow will be Friday. Both the chickens were in the coop during the day most of the week. T. let them roam all day Wednesday, but we generally don't do that. Even though they're in the backyard, they're still chickens and they seem at risk for hawks, raccoons, or opossums. I prefer to only have them out when we're home or when the dog or us can be out there with them.

Sunday Morning Walkaround

Current Count: 33 eggs

So both #2 and #3 have been allowed to roam around the backyard all weekend, and each laid an egg this morning. I know they really like their time out in the yard, but I also think it may serve a purpose. The moving around helps keep their little chicken systems moving. The combination of the feed and the infusion of variety from bugs and plants in the yard provides all the necessary nutrients, and the walking helps keep them "regular."

At least, that's my opinion.

After a Week of Rain

Current Count: 31 eggs

I was finally able to let the girls come out today. They've been penned up all week because of the rain, the early sunset, and the fact that T. and I are both working until it's dark now. I think there's something about getting to walk around that encourages egg laying. During the week we started get an egg from each of them every other day rather than every day. I also had a lot harder time updating this week because I got home late and it was cold and wet outside. Feeding and watering the chickens was no problem but collecting the eggs is a little bit of a hassle. I have to climb up on a step ladder, lift a hinged 2' x 4' piece of plywood and hold it while I lean over to the furthest corner in the coop. Once I have eggs in my hand, I then have to pull myself back while I continue holding the plywood up. It's a PITA even on dry days, but when you make the step ladder slippery and add rain coming down, what could possibly go wrong?

I found this to be an enjoyable scene when I walked into the bedroom this morning:


I don't think the cat realizes that the chickens could probably whoop up on him if he actually got out there.

In other news, NorCal got some rain this week. God knows we need it, but it sure does make life at an elementary school a lot more complicated. The kids and the staff are cooped up all day, and everybody gets cabin fever. There was a brief period this week where we had about 550 kids in the gym as we transitioned between our two lunches. There's not enough Excedrin in the world to stave off the headache that brings on....God Bless our folks who work as Noon Duty Supervisors.

Inauguration Day

Current Count: 27 eggs

The chickens were both asleep by the time we got home and checked on them tonight. It really is true that chickens completely lose their ability to function once they get roosted for the night. You can pick them up, pet them, move them around. They cluck but they don't resist in any way. Yikes.

In other news, the United States of America inaugurated Barack Obama as the 44th President today. The significance of his identity as the first African-American President was not lost on the nation or the media.

How to Collect the Data

Current Count: 25 eggs

We've been talking about whether or not to begin listing the number of eggs by each chicken, but I still haven't made up my mind. This pair of eggs arrived uneventfully.

In other news, I bowled my first game over 200 last night, a 206 to be exact.

A Flurry of Activity

Current Count: 23 eggs!!

Okay, so I'm still working on checking out the coop and posting when I get home from work. Since it was the weekend, we had some other commitments, and I'm just now getting us all caught up. It seems like #3 has turned into a lean, mean, laying machine. She's giving us one egg every day, and sometimes two. #2 is reliably giving us one. If it keeps up, we'll have at least two dozen by the time the inauguration festivities are in full swing.

Since I don't have any fun pictures from my own chickens today, we turn to the chicken community. Check out this fellow. An unfortunate story, but it makes for great conversation at cocktail parties.

http://www.miketheheadlesschicken.org/story.php

In other news, a friend of mine got Rock Band 2 for the Wii, so I spent most of last night mastering the backbeat from "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor. How can you not love one of the 12 Rocky themes?

Hitting a Groove

Current count: 18 eggs

Sure enough...got home from work today, went out and checked, and there were two eggs in the little nest that #2 and #3 have apparently decided to share. There was one egg of each color, so we're pretty sure they're both laying, but again, we haven't actually seen #3 doing the work. I've now added one egg every morning to my breakfast (thank god my cholesterol is fine). One of the great things about having the chickens is having them cruise around the backyard sometimes. One of the surprising things that happens, though, is this:

You go to walk out your back door and they're right there acting like they want to come in and watch TV or something. This also creates a little bit of a waste problem right outside your door--easy to get rid of, but I'd rather they kept all that in the yard.

Three's a crowd

Current Count: 16 eggs

Actually...three eggs makes an omelet, not necessarily a crowd. For anyone who's been following along at home, you can do the math and see that something new has happened. I last posted 2 days ago, and today's egg count reflects a triple play, bringing the grand total to 16 eggs. Apparently, #3 has become another contributor. Here is a picture of today's collection. The one on top of the pile that's standing up is a different color from the others, and it's also pointier than the others. T. and I have come to the conclusion that this means we have a second egg layer.



In other news, I did go back to work, which for me is an elementary school, where I am the vice principal. All the folks at school have been following the chicken saga from the beginning, so everyone's embracing my excitement level around the whole egg laying process. I work with wonderful people.

A Combination Flock/Pack

Current count: 13 eggs (avg. $3.29/doz.)

So now she's laid a baker's dozen. I've used two of them in cookies, and I do think it's made a difference for the better, both in sugar and chocolate chip.

One of the questions that comes up in conversation is how the chickens and the dog do together. Thankfully, the dog was already 9 years old when the chickens arrived and managed to get accustomed them pretty quickly. The chickens didn't know any better so they've gotten used to him, but only in that chicken-y way where they squawk and run away if he expresses any interest in them at all. They can all hang out together if he acts like he doesn't see them (see below).




In other news, there's bowling tonight, and then back to school tomorrow, my first time up at 5 AM since the middle of December.

Even Dozen

Current count: 12 eggs (avg. $3.29/doz.)

The unrest at the chicken coop was not repeated this morning, although #2 was irritated I didn't show up until almost 11 to let them out. They've discovered an area of the rose bed that T. pruned back and cleaned out last week. It's apparently a jackpot for bugs because the chickens are scratching in there like crazy and then pecking around. The arrival of the 12th egg was uneventful as far as I know. Here's a shot of the coop where the chickens hang out. It's 4' x 8' with a raised little house. They seem to like it just fine.



In other news, I've discovered the best corned beef hash in Sacramento...homemade at Cassidy's, a restaurant at the corner of 51st and Folsom. It's the most delectable combination of real corned beef, shredded up potatoes, and bell peppers and it is FRESH. I'm not kidding when I say it's the best corned beef hash I've ever had in my life.

Riot in the Coop

Current count: 11 eggs

Last night the chickens must have been hungry because they ate all their food and then rioted, kicking over their dishes (both of them) and crapping all over the water dish. They did not, however, go on strike. #2 had an egg yesterday and there was another one in there this afternoon, which I still have to pull out.

In other news, not much other news. I'm going back to work on Monday after a full month of vacation. Thing are in a bit of a state of transition, but that's for another time. Here's a picture of #3, the nervous chicken little that still isn't laying. I believe it was taken while she was being terrified of a squash during the summer.

Even God Took A Rest

Current Count: 9 eggs

I guess #2 declared yesterday her day off. No eggs in the coop. Today I got back from working out around 2:00 and bingo, here's another egg. I get excited every time...it's like a little voice says, "You'll never have to be hungry as long as you have her around." I wonder where that comes from.

In other news, my cousin and her husband have been in NorCal for week visiting friends so we connected in Oakland yesterday. We decided to go on a tour of a local chocolate factory in Berkeley. http://www.scharffenberger.com/ It turned out to be interesting and we got good free chocolate samples.

A visit to the Farmer's Market

Current Count: 8 eggs

#2 just keeps putting 'em out...not sure exactly when today. I continue to be amazed that she's generating something other people will pay for. We went to the farmer's market this morning and I couldn't help but notice that organic free range eggs were $2.75/half dozen and $5.00/dozen for large AA. I'm not sure what makes an egg "large" vs. "extra large" but I bet a visit to Wikipedia would take care of that. The same is probably true for grading them.

In other news, I was out on the bike trail this afternoon and spotted a grey coyote walking along between the levy and the golf course. We passed within 10 feet of each other, and she didn't really seem to care.

Veil of Mystery Completely Lifted

Current Count: 7 eggs

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Eggsact Uses

1 in a batch of cookies
1 given to friends
1 eaten scrambled
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So up until yesterday neither of us had actually seen the laying process. Well, that all changed today. T. was out working in the yard and heard #2 making a bunch of noise while #3 ran all around. Finally, #3 ran back into the coop and T. followed her back to see WTF. #2 was inside in the little circle she had scooped out. One minute there was nothing there, and the next, boom, there's an egg inside the circle.

Lifting the Veil of Mystery

Current Count: 6 eggs--the even half dozen



While we haven't actually seen any eggs get layed, I think we both feel pretty confident that it's #2 (the chicken in the picture). She's had some behavioral changes in that she let's us pet her now, squatting down and spreading her wings a little bit (kind of like she would if one were a rooster, hmmm). Also, this morning when I went to go check in on them, she was the one who had made herself a little circle in the wood chips and was sitting. When T. went to go check about 11:30, boom, the sixth egg had arrived!

First Entry - An Introduction

Current Count: 5 Eggs

Every time I tell someone I have a couple chickens they invariably ask me if I got them for eggs or for-- nudge, nudge, wink,wink--meat. In all reality, I got the chickens because I'm a pushover and several second graders asked me if I would take some home. I wound up with three, one of whom turned out to be a rooster, again because I'm a big pushover. I did draw the line at the rooster once he progressed from croaking every morning to full blown crowing--I just couldn't have it. Luckily, he found a home even better than mine, leaving the two hens to grow up here. They hatched in May so I expected eggs some time in November. It never happened. Then it was Christmas, and it was cold, and I left to go see family on Christmas Day. I figured there would be no egg action until it warmed up. I talked to my partner on the 27th, and he said that eggs had been laid. Yee Haw!

I was surprised to detect a thread of self-sufficiency in myself, imagining a world where I was depending on my chickens to barter my way to a better station in life...curses the departure of the rooster. Here's what they looked like when they first got here, but they changed quickly and dramatically.